No matter how hard you try not to compare your little munchkins, they themselves start competing, over anything and everything.
Literally.
From who will complete the homework first, to who is going to watch tv first. From whose sandwich is getting prepared first, to who has more cheese in the sandwich. It’s becomes big deal for all children, and in no case, they want to lose the battle.
Nothing works when this all-time unsaid competition is on.
How much you keep on telling them that this fight isn’t worth or it doesn’t matter; they never listen. Telling them not to compete, won’t make it stop.
If you try to resolve this baseless fight, you are put in a tight spot. No matter how much you try to be neutral, there would be one who will be disappointed.
Lot of noise and tension is created, which is meaningless.
Here are few ways which might help in reducing the competition among siblings.
- At that point, don’t tell them who’s right and who’s wrong. They will never understand. Later on, may be individually, you can make them understand the situation and tell them if they were right or wrong.
- Don’t compare. Saying words like “Look at her, she is such a good girl.”, or “See, you brother is so nice, he always lets you do things.”, will lead to competition between the children. One might love music lessons, but other might just like to play with friends. So, comparing the siblings will definitely start some sort of rivalry among them.
- At times, children do things purposefully, to gain attention. These are cases when one child feels left out or inferior to the other, may be because of your behaviour or expectations from them.
- Gradually help your children understand that all children equally important to parents and there should be love and understanding among the siblings.
- Help your children understand the importance of siblings in life and how much they are needed. So instead of competing, they must try to uplift each other and grow better together.
- Talk to your children on an individual basis and try to figure out why they compete, when they are not comparable. Each one of them has their own strengths and weaknesses.
- Helping your child know who, when, where and why needs support and in siblings always equality will not hold right, is of extreme importance. If the elder one needs support to learn guitar, the younger one might need help in doing the easiest home-work. Make them understand by giving them simple examples.
A friendly competition like who will finish the meal first, or who will bring mom’s cell phone from the room might sound normal, and they are part of growing up together, but don’t let your children take it too far.Help your children learn the difference between having fun and being nasty.
Teach your children to value each other’s presence in their lives, and competition will no longer find its place among them.
Patience is the key to build rock-solid and happy relationships amongst siblings.
It’s a time taking process, so relax and enjoy their childhood.
Happy parenting!!
